Hellooooo ljudi... Ok, ummmm, ovo sam odavno napisala i cuvala sam ga, onako ljubomorno, ali eto, doslo mi je da postavim na 4um posto odavno nismo videli nista moje ovde XD Bas me zanima sta mislite o ovome. Licno, obozavam ovu fikciju
Izvinite zbog mogucih gresaka, vrv sam uspela negde da progutam slovo i to XDD <3
A change of heart
“What would you want me do, Lord?” an angry voice sounded from a distant part of a large property, upon which a house was built. A mansion, to be more precise, a Manor handed down from father to son in the family of Kaulitz.
It was known that the noble family had always been in good terms with the Palace, the King and Queen favored them among all others for their loyalty and class.
Yet, the latest Earl to descend as the Head of Kaulitz Estate had somehow diminished the picture his ancestors built for years. Yes, Lord Thomas Kaulitz married someone of the lower class.
You can not say it was a happy affair as weddings should be, no, it was rather dull, terribly sad how Lord and Lady of the House came to be wedded.
It was rumored that Lady Kaulitz, who was at that time three years ago but a mere girl of fifteen, lost her parents. How, nobody but them knows. Somehow, the Earl, who had just come into his own fortune left to him by his deceased father, had noticed the girl. When and where it remains unknown to all but a few people.
Distant relatives of the Earl who attended the wedding, and have opposed to it by all means, say the girl was reluctant. Having lost everything, she must have been blackmailed by the Earl somehow, for she herself would have never willingly given her freedom to him.
The Lady Kaulitz still, having turned eighteen a few months prior, hadn’t dealt with her fate, even though three years have passed. To say the Earl has treated her unwell would be a lie; he had never so much as touched her or forced her into anything. The young girl was surprised he never called upon his rights as her husband, but it suited her like this better. If she was to be tied to him by law, she would not permit it be so by nature and physique.
“You tell me, Marie, that after three years you have tired of it all?” The Earl’s voice sounded, booming through the house for everyone to hear. For the entire length of their marriage, Lord Thomas being 6 years older than the Lady and still very young himself, the Lord and the Lady of the House have always kept appearances. For the world they were happily married, but among themselves they were as cold as ice bergs.
The secret was, as it were, that the only reason the Earl married her was, if you wish to hear, very simple. The Earl had met her earlier, when he himself was but a boy, and she had always captivated him. By his words, watching her grow was his favorite pastime. As the years passed, and she became more and more a Lady, the Earl fell in love with the girl.
Oh, you noticed it? I had said they were cold towards each other, but that part does not make much sense if the Earl was in love. Of course, the only reason he was cold is because his stubborn nature desired it. If the Lady chose to be hostile, so would he, and if the Lady was being nice, so he would soften.
“Yes, I have grown tired of this charade!” The Lady countered, her voice equally strong and loud as her husband’s had been.
“You dare say such a thing –” the Lord started, but his wife cut him off, something only she dared ever do. Normally, if the Earl raised his voice, that meant no room was left for arguments. Still, the Lady seemed fearless.
“Do not dare tell me what I can or can not do, Thomas!”
“Keep your voice down, Marie!”
Both parties stared at each other; the only occupant of the Lord’s office, beside the Lady and the Lord himself, was the old butler, sadly aware of the whole situation, who had just finished pouring their afternoon tea.
“If the Lord and Lady would like to have their tea some other time, I shall discard the dishes immediately,” the butler said.
“No need,” the Lady had found her voice and had strolled to one of the large windows behind the Lord’s desk. The Lord remained in his seat the whole time, regaining his composure.
“You may retire now,” he said to the butler and waived his hand to dismiss him. The butler, taking this as an unmistakable cue for him to leave, bowed to the Lord and left the room.
As soon as he was out of hearing range, or so the husband and wife thought, the Lord stood up from his chair and walked to his wife, placing his hands on her shoulders. Immediately upon feeling his touch, she jerked away, quickly walking to one of the bookshelves lining the right wall of the spacious room.
“I am afraid I do not understand you,” the Lord said, not knowing what to do with his own hands.
“I have been locked up in this horrid place ever since I was tied to you in that God forsaken church. Even now I remember the date only so I could detest it from the bottom of my soul. Still, even though I endured terrible loneliness at this Manor, I have never been dignified an answer as to why you have married me. May this be my lucky day?” She gave her husband a half hearted smile as she turned the upper half of her body towards him.
“I fail to see why you act as if you were a spoiled child. Nothing is at fault here. I provide everything you need and –” Once again, the Earl was cut off, only this time, it wasn’t a shout, it was a barely audible whisper that rolled over her lips.
“Except two things I need the most.”
“And those would be, my Lady?”
“Freedom and love. I only need one of these to be happy. Freedom means not living by your side, it means I would be on my own to pick a husband to my liking since our marriage hasn’t been consumed yet, and it has been three years. Love would mean that, by some miraculous event, I would grow fond of you, as you would grow fond of me. I dare say that, after this time, it is hardly going to be the case.”
“Marie, you are trying to make me feel guilty for my actions all those years ago.”
“And are you not supposed to be?!” She demanded. “What have I ever done to anyone to deserve this?!”
“Many would be lucky to be in your place!” The Lord shouted suddenly, his dirty blond hair falling slightly out of place. “So why aren’t you?!”
“Because I never asked for this! I was perfectly fine with my life as it was until you came along.”
“I came along long before we became husband and wife. You played with me, you used to tease me, talk to me, smile to me. Where had that Maria gone?”
“She had gone to hell! That Maria disappeared when you made her vow to you at the altar!”
“You never fail to amaze me,” the Lord whispered, eyeing his full teacup.
“I fail to see the point of that sentence,” the Lady said calmly.
“I thought you would be able to figure it out by now. You, the one who’s dark hair and eyes the color of melted dark chocolate captivated me since you were but a child.”
“Thomas, are you trying to tell me –”
“YES! That is exactly what I am trying to tell you! And you have the nerve to come here and tell me, that while I had eyes only for you through our entire marriage, you were in love with someone else!”
The eyes the Earl had just praised went wide with shock and fear. Shock, for the sudden realization and fear for the Lord of the House had been advancing on her as he spoke.
“And not only are you in love with whoever he is, but you are also in correspondence with him! Do not try to deny it; I saw the letters you received.”
At these words, anger flared inside the Mistress. “You read my personal mail! How could you?!”
“I could, because you bear the mark of my belonging!” The Lord had grabbed her by her forearms and, as much as she tried to jerk her hands away, his hold only tightened up.
“I never bore a mark of your belonging, Sir!”
“Ah, you may have not been mine in the physical way, but you are mine in the eyes of God,” the voice was somehow malicious, a tone she had never heard before and that sent shivers up and down her spine.
A few moments passed, the Earl holding onto his wife whilst trying to calm himself down. Only when he had the anger under control, had he noticed that the Lady in his arms was shaking with unreleased sobs. He softened immediately, enveloping his wife in his arms in an attempt to comfort her.
She melted into his touch but, after realizing who it was that was holding her, she pushed her husband aside.
“Don’t you touch me!” she spat the words at him, backing away towards the door but, deciding her legs would give away, just stood at the spot, wiping away a few tears that were only replaced by new ones.
“Maria…” The Lord began, but the girl in question just shook her head. She fell to her knees, sobbing, her dress flowing with movement. Her corset was too tight, she couldn’t breathe properly and, though this never bothered her before, she despised Victorian dresses in that particular moment.
“Are you not planning on giving me my freedom back? Are you a man that would rather keep me here, against my free will, than have myself happy and as a friend? Tell me your intentions for I am at your mercy, Sir.”
“I am a jealous man, my dear Lady, and therefore my answer is no. I shall not give you your freedom back and the sooner you accept it, the better our lives would be. And as for our not consuming our marriage, I fully expect an heir; a male, at that.” With those words, the Lord and Master of the House left his office, the afternoon tea long forgotten, leaving his wife’s shaking form on the floor.
She had left the decision to him, and he had decided. Lady Maria Valentine Kaulitz will remain his, and no other man will ever be able to touch her.
~~~~~***~~~~~
A year has passed with no further incident resembling this one. The Lady of the House seemed different somehow and all the servants have noticed. She took her meals in her chambers, spent most of her time between the library and her own room, and had rarely spoken a word to the Lord. She had fallen ill more times that year alone than in all her years spent at the Manor.
This worried the young Lord; however, he never gave up on her as was his decision.
With a sigh, he laid his knuckles on the door of the Lady’s room, having already entered the main doors of her chamber. Receiving no answer, the Lord helped himself in, closing the door behind him when he entered.
His eyes instantly locked with those of the Lady’s. They remained like that for a while until the Lady looked away, returning her eyes to the book in her hands. The emerald dress she wore that day hugged her body perfectly, as any other dress she owned, and the Earl found himself undressing her with his eyes. He reached as far as to loosening her corset before he stopped himself by shaking his head.
“You may sit, if you like,” she said, once again looking at her husband, the ends of her hair, the only parts of the dark brown silkiness that were curled up, bounced lightly at her movement. “May I inquire of the nature of your visit?”
“It is a very nice day outside,” he said, sitting beside his wife as the girl visibly tensed. “I have finished all my work for today and was hoping for a small celebration of your birthday, my Lady.”
Her head shot up, the locks tantalizingly bouncing all around. “Today is my birthday?”
“Yes,” he whispered in her ear, sliding his hands over her exposed collarbone, snapping a pearl necklace in place just moments after. “I wish you a very happy birthday.”
Her fingers touched the cold pearls of the necklace that lay against her ivory skin. He gave her a sincere smile when her eyes searched for him.
“Take it as a present from me, then, and as a token of my sincere apologies for all that I have done you wrong in the past.”
The Lord stood up, extending his hand for his Lady to take. Her hand, almost shaking, fell into his and she hoisted herself up from her seat.
“May I be so bold as to seek to be in your company outside for a while? I had the servants set up a table for us. We could take our afternoon tea there and, maybe, some cake.”
She could only nod and, before she realized it, she was quietly sipping tea in the garden, eyes of her husband observing her every move.
“I dare risk ruining this fine and peaceful day by saying this but, have you maybe warmed up to the idea of spending your life here?”
The Lady closed her eyes, calmly returning her teacup to its platter.
“It can’t be helped,” she whispered. “So I decided to make the best of it, since I will probably be here for many years to come.”
“Yet you lock yourself in your room, reading all day. Is that, Marie, what you call ‘making the best of it’?”
“I was under the impression you were displeased with me. I though I was doing you a favor by distancing myself from you.”
“You thought that you were, by that, doing me a favor?” The Lord laughed whole heartedly, a thing he had not done for a while. “You must be barmy. Absolutely mad, you are, my girl. How could you be doing me a favor by leaving me to take every meal on my own, by condemning me to spend my free time among drunken business associates?”
That day, the servants were met with an extraordinary sight. The Lady laughed along, her voice ringing like the most beautiful of bells.
“A mistake I will never repeat again. I have learned my lesson. This past year has been lonely, but it did leave me with a lot of time for thinking.” She lifted her gaze and locked her eyes with those of her husband’s. “You may think I wasn’t conscious for it,” her hand fell against his, caressing it. “But I wish to thank you for spending all that time by my bed while I was ill, and for all the sweet things you said.”
A blush crept to her cheeks as she realized she was caressing his hand, so she quickly busied herself by taking a sip of tea. He dismissed the butler and a couple of maids that were standing nearby their table for a more intimate conversation.
“I once again risk of ruining this day by asking, but I simply must inquire,” He said once the employees were inside the Manor. “Might your feelings have suffered a great change over this past year?” It was his hand that was now holding hers tightly, his eyes filled with anticipation.
“I am not completely sure,” she frowned, and he reached for her face with his other hand in order to straighten the lines that appeared on her face because of the expression. “I definitely do not hate you anymore, nor do I blame you for anything. In fact, I am now aware that I have never hated you in the slightest. I surely feel a strong… I feel a strong…” Her words were lost as another blush tainted her cheeks, painting the ivory skin a pale red.
A triumphant smirk spread on his lips as he straightened in his seat, letting her hand go.
“It is quite alright,” he said. “You are not obligated to finish the thought. With you, I become a patient person. Now, if you will excuse me, my Lady…” and with that, he stood up, kissed her hand, and walked towards the house.
As he entered, he saw the maids that were just outside with them peeking through the window, hidden completely by the curtains.
“I think the Mistress is starting to feel something for the Master,” one of them said.
“I dare agree,” The other one piped in. “She had been blushing recently whenever we would so much as mention him. And she heard me telling you all the things he whispered to her while she was sick. A nice reminder it was.”
“I really hope she would admit her feelings for the Master soon. I have always longed to see who their child would look like the most.”
“I would say the child would look like the both of us,” the Lord smiled, startling the two maids that apologized and ran off to do their work, leaving their master to look through the large window himself and find that his wife had stood up and was now standing a few feet away from the table, the wind gently caressing her form. He never thought it possible to be jealous of a thing as trivial as the wind, but he certainly envied it for being able to reach out and freely touch that skin.
~~~~~***~~~~~
The Lady had once, in front of a few servants in the early months of their marriage, snapped at him and said that ‘It would be a cold day in Hell before she ever started feeling anything towards him’.
Today, it would seem, it was snowing in the very wretched place she had mentioned that day. Her maid was helping her put her clothes on and arrange her hair when the sudden realization hit her. She was thinking of the previous night and the dance she and her husband shared after dinner and the kiss that resulted and her cheeks heated up, painting her face, neck and shoulders a vibrant red.
“Mistress, the Master has acquired me to tell you that he would be off to business for at least a month. He also wished me to ask if you would like us to summon you some company; maybe a relative of yours?”
She just shook her hand, dismissing her in all, too shocked to do anything else. She watched the maid’s retreating back and, after the doors of her chamber were closed, she let out a frustrated scream. He dares do this to her now? Now that she has realized everything!
A feeling of cold dread used her spine as a ladder as thoughts flooded her mind. Could he have gotten past all his feelings in the past few months? Could he have never felt anything at all?
A knock shook her out of her thoughts. Her maid entered the room and bowed to her.
“Master has just now informed me that he has sent one of his associates to the meeting in London, so he will be staying here.” With that she excused herself, turned around and left.
Breakfast was a quiet affair consisted of gloating and smirking from both sides.
~~~~~***~~~~~
A few more meetings were missed by the Lord the following winter, and the annual trip to London for the season has been canceled due to the Lady expecting. It was spring and the Lord was becoming more stressed the more the due date approached.
The Lord and Lady Kaulitz were seated in the drawing room, enjoying tea after dinner, when a loud crash from the other side of the room made the Lord look at his wife, her face screwed up in pain, her teacup smashed on the floor.
“Dear, what is the matter?” He asked, approaching her when a maid rushed into the room.
The maid let out a tiny scream before she ran off to fetch the doctor.
The Lord promptly panicked.
“Would you just calm down, Thomas?!” The Lady’s agitated voice reached to him as he slowed down in carrying his beloved into their bed chamber. They had moved there almost a year ago, a few months after the Lady’s nineteenth birthday.
“I am sorry dear. This is new to me, don’t fail to notice that.”
She suddenly grabbed his hand painfully.
“I hate you!” she spat and, before the confused Lord had time to inquire as to what has led to such a sudden change of heart, she let out a scream.
After much pain, screaming and unladylike words, the next Earl had been brought to the world.
Holding his crying soon in his arms while watching his exhausted wife breathing heavily on the blood smeared sheets, smiling weakly at them, Lord Thomas Kaulitz couldn’t help but feel lucky. He kissed his son’s forehead, welcoming Lord Alexander Andrew Kaulitz into the family.
Sitting beside his wife on the bed, he cradled the tiny baby in his arms, his eyes never leaving his son’s face. He just had to admire what a little hated his wife felt for him before, mixed with a great amount of love they now shared had created.
Surely, all they needed was a change of heart.
Subject: A change of heart 
Sun Mar 20, 2011 10:14 pm
Jaaako mi se dopada tema i sto si pricu smestila u to vreme. Ovo je sve sem klasicnog fictiona, that's for sure 
Originalno je i to mi se dopada 
